OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
