i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
