oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Randomize