I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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