i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
