im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize