I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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