Apparently you make a good broom.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
Randomize
