I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
Randomize
