quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Randomize
