after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize
