i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize