we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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