So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
