it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
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