We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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