That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
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