Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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