Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
