operation have a gay friend backfired
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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