Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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