I think my vagina is haunted
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Randomize