so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
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