I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
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