Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
