is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
