i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
