he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize