i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
