I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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