just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize