the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
You work out of a Hotel?
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
