Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
Randomize
