How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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