i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize