You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
i out mim tonsoeep
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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