OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
