Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.�
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Randomize
