Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
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