his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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