My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
