Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
You can't motorboat a personality
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
