I feel great
I just peed on a car
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
