Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
