Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize
