I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
