When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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