The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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