So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
