how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
